RICKY
I’m still in a bit of shock: Ricky could’ve gone anywhere and seen anyone and he chooses Siegfried and Roy! It was a great vacation though. One week in Vegas with the whole family. We have one-liners that we still use today from that time…I just can’t get Starlight Express out of my head.My memories of Ricky are many and I have tried to limit them to 5-7 minutes. For those who knew him intimately, then you know that is a hard task. When I was eleven years old, and I found out Mom was pregnant, I couldn’t wait to have a younger brother. Not that having 2 younger sisters wasn’t great, it was…but I really wanted a younger brother and I knew I would soon get my chance. I could hardly wait to teach him all about sports, play catch with him, and show him how to look up fantasy stats in the LA Times sports page. However, sometimes life doesn’t always turn out the way we expect it.
With apologies to Benjamin Button, I believe Ricky’s life could be summed up in the title The Curious Case of Richard Hendrickson because like Benjamin Button, Ricky’s 24 years on this earth were truly miraculous. In the movie, Benjamin was born old, wasn’t supposed to survive the night, but was loved unconditionally by the mother who raised him. Because of that love, Benjamin not only survived the night, he grew younger as the years went on and was able to experience life in his own way. There were many pitfalls for Benjamin but he understood them, accepted them, and grew to love them because he was living life as only he knew how.
My brother Ricky was Benjamin Button 24 years ago. He was born with many complications, wasn’t supposed to survive the night, but because of the unconditional love of my father and mother, he not only survived the night…he survived for 24 years. Even knowledgeable doctors called him a breathing miracle. Because of my parent’s love, Ricky grew in wisdom and glory as the years went on and was able to experience life in his own way. Through the countless surgeries and painful pitfalls that came his way, Ricky’s knowledge of the gospel became clear as he understood them, accepted them, and grew to love them because he was living life as only he knew how.
One distinct memory I have of Ricky was when he was around 2 years old. My brothers and I decided to grab a blanket, put Ricky in the middle, and throw him in the air. We knew we weren’t supposed to do this especially when Mom came running into the room but we knew he would love it. And love it, he did; however, I think we cursed him for life because as he grew older, any roller coaster with a severe drop in it struck a sudden dread in him probably recalling the fear/joy he felt during that time when he was only 2.
As my brother grew older, we learned as older siblings that he just wanted to be part of the group: whether it was playing Nintendo, eating dinner, going to church dances, or doing his one of his favorite pastimes, playing Monopoly. Many pictures we have are ones with him smiling from ear to ear just grateful for being included. And this never went away. When his nieces and nephews would visit in his later years, he loved being the Pied Piper giving them rides in his wheelchair, showing them how to play Wii, and of course breaking out his multiple versions of Monopoly. My kids loved playing with him and Ricky loved being an Uncle.
In D+C 88:123-125, it reads: See that ye love one another; cease to be covetous; learn to impart one to another as the gospel requires. Cease to be idle; cease to be unclean; cease to find fault one with another; cease to sleep longer than is needful; retire to thy bed early, that ye may not be weary; arise early, that your bodies and your minds may be invigorated. And above all things, clothe yourselves with the bond of charity, as with a mantle, which is the bond of perfectness and peace.
This was my brother’s creed…..well, except for the sleeping in part. Us Hendricksons love to sleep in. Ricky loved everyone unconditionally. He never coveted what he didn’t have. I don’t remember him one time saying, “Whoa is me. I wish I could walk. I wish I could breathe. I wish I didn’t have a shunt on my head. I wish I didn’t have a trach in my throat.” As a matter of fact, in one of our family pictures, the photographer thought she would do him a favor and photoshop his trach out making him appear, I guess, more “normal.” I don’t think I’ve seen Ricky more upset….well except for the time when he was told by my parents that he would have to stop eating BBQ chips, cheese, and ketchup. Now that was not a pretty sight. Anyway, he was upset because he knew he wasn’t “normal” and he never wanted to be. The trach set him apart from others and I believe he saw it as a symbol for who he was and who he had become.
Ricky’s “mantle” was charity. He loved to serve others. When told he wouldn’t be able to serve a “normal” 2 year mission, he decided to go on a “service mission.” He would get up early, put on a shirt and tie, slide on his nametag, and have my father, mother, or nurse drive him to the Family History Center. It was there where he would spend many hours a day serving others for the next 2 years. Those might’ve been the happiest years of his life just like they are for most missionaries. He felt close to our Heavenly Father because he knew just like King Benjamin taught that “when you are in the service of your fellow beings, you are only in the service of your God.”
The veil was very thin for Ricky. He knew where he came from. He knew why he was here and he knew where he was going. I truly believe that there are those special spirits in this life who are waited on by others and it is those same special spirits that will again be waited on in the next life in a much different capacity. My brother was and is one of the special spirits. I feel proud to have known him so intimately. I feel proud to have learned from him. I feel proud to have him teach me all that he did about strength and perseverance. I feel proud to call him brother. And I will feel proud to wait on him in the next life.
Near the end of the movie, Benjamin Button says:
"Along the way you bump into people who make a dent on your life. Some people get struck by lightning. Some are born to sit by a river. Some have an ear for music. Some are artists. Some swim the English Channel. Some know buttons. Some know Shakespeare. Some are mothers. And some people can dance."
If you knew my brother, he made a dent in your life. Some people (like Ricky) get struck with spina bifida. Some people (like Ricky), have a trach so they can talk. Some people (like Ricky) go through countless surgeries in order to live life. Some people (like Ricky) serve 2 year missions. Some people (like Ricky) love to play Monopoly. And some people (live Ricky) love to dance.”
I know he’s up there dancing circles around everyone and smiling from ear to ear and I can hardly wait to be reunited with him and see him in his full glory.
In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
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